Dear Diary,
Today was one of those days where I’m just done.
The kind of day where it feels like no matter how much I love my family, I’m stuck in this endless loop—wiping bums, chasing after toys, and somehow always being the one on call.
Don’t get me wrong—my husband is superb. Truly, I couldn’t ask for more. He helps out, he’s amazing with the kids, but here’s the thing: I’m still the default parent. The one the kids always run to, the one they want when they’re upset, hungry, or just bored. It’s like they have a radar for me, even when I try to sneak five minutes of peace.
And it’s exhausting.
The kind of tired that seeps into your bones, where it’s not just physical but emotional too. I mean, how many times can one person hear “Mum, Mum, Mum!” before they lose their mind, right?
It’s beautiful, it’s heartwarming... and it’s so overwhelming. No matter how much my husband does (and he does a lot), the kids just want me. And some days, I feel like there’s nothing left to give.
That’s where the loneliness kicks in—the kind no one talks about.
You’re surrounded by love, but also completely alone in the responsibility. It’s like the weight of being the default parent is something only another mum could understand.
I know I’m not the only one who feels this way, but in the moment, it can feel so isolating. Like I’m giving every piece of myself to everyone else and there’s nothing left for me.
And that’s when I realised—I need other mums. Mums who get it, who understand what it’s like to be the go-to for everything, all the time. Someone who can say, “Me too,” and make me feel just a little less alone.
That’s what we’re missing—the mum tribe. The women who lift each other up when it feels like the whole world is sitting on our shoulders. I love my family, but some days, I need to feel seen, to be understood without having to explain. I need another mum who knows exactly what it’s like to be the one they call on, no matter how incredible your support team is.
So here’s to finding that connection.
Because as mums, we don’t have to do this alone. Together, we rise. And maybe, just maybe, we’ll finally get a moment to ourselves too.
Love, The Default Parent Who Needs a Break
Today was one of those days where I’m just done.
The kind of day where it feels like no matter how much I love my family, I’m stuck in this endless loop—wiping bums, chasing after toys, and somehow always being the one on call.
Don’t get me wrong—my husband is superb. Truly, I couldn’t ask for more. He helps out, he’s amazing with the kids, but here’s the thing: I’m still the default parent. The one the kids always run to, the one they want when they’re upset, hungry, or just bored. It’s like they have a radar for me, even when I try to sneak five minutes of peace.
And it’s exhausting.
The kind of tired that seeps into your bones, where it’s not just physical but emotional too. I mean, how many times can one person hear “Mum, Mum, Mum!” before they lose their mind, right?
It’s beautiful, it’s heartwarming... and it’s so overwhelming. No matter how much my husband does (and he does a lot), the kids just want me. And some days, I feel like there’s nothing left to give.
That’s where the loneliness kicks in—the kind no one talks about.
You’re surrounded by love, but also completely alone in the responsibility. It’s like the weight of being the default parent is something only another mum could understand.
I know I’m not the only one who feels this way, but in the moment, it can feel so isolating. Like I’m giving every piece of myself to everyone else and there’s nothing left for me.
And that’s when I realised—I need other mums. Mums who get it, who understand what it’s like to be the go-to for everything, all the time. Someone who can say, “Me too,” and make me feel just a little less alone.
That’s what we’re missing—the mum tribe. The women who lift each other up when it feels like the whole world is sitting on our shoulders. I love my family, but some days, I need to feel seen, to be understood without having to explain. I need another mum who knows exactly what it’s like to be the one they call on, no matter how incredible your support team is.
So here’s to finding that connection.
Because as mums, we don’t have to do this alone. Together, we rise. And maybe, just maybe, we’ll finally get a moment to ourselves too.
Love, The Default Parent Who Needs a Break
